How to Overcome Fear in Seven Easy Steps

The key to making sure your Hilda doesn’t keep you from chasing down your outrageous goals is send her out for coffee so you can confront those fears straight on. And I happen to have some quick-and-dirty steps to help you do just that!

In this video, I'm going to teach you how to overcome any fear in just seven easy steps. Remember, you only feel fear when something matters to you. Most of the time when something matters to you, it means you're about to break new ground or break out of your comfort zone or risk something in a big way.

Here is a simple coaching exercise to help you THINK through - instead of only FEELING through - those fears so you can get clear on your next bold steps. Looking at your next big thing, bust out pen and paper and think through the seven steps.

Here’s a simple coaching exercise to help you think through — instead of always feeling through — those fears so you can get clear on your next bold steps. Looking at one audacious goal of yours, bust out pen and paper and think through the following:


1. What are you really afraid of? (0:25) 

Take a deep breath and just freaking name your fear. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of the unknown, fear of what others might think, fear of rejection, fear of missing out, fear of change, fear of rocking the boat, fear that you don’t know enough, and on and on. I’ve heard them all (and felt most of them myself)! Breaking down what it really is that’s holding you back is honestly 50 percent of the game.


2. Consider the worst possible scenario. (1:24)

Seriously, go ahead and list all the possible absolutely horrible outcomes that you imagine. You’re already thinking about this, so just say it aloud or write it down. Getting real about how bad things could go often gives you a massive reality check — more often than not, the worst case scenario isn’t all that bad.


3. Imagine the best possible scenario. (2:22)

Now, list all the potentially great outcomes, you know, if everything goes your way. You’ve probably not let your imagination run wild in this area yet, so give it a whirl. What kind of awesome is in store for you if you achieve this goal?


4. Where in this scenario do you have control? (2:46) 

While you can’t control everything, you surely have control over your approach and efforts. List everything you have complete control over. This could include how much you hustle, whether or not you throw in the towel after a setback, how often you put yourself out there, your expectations of others and dozens other self-controllable actions and inactions.


5. Where in this scenario do you have influence? (3:25)

List where you might not have control, but you certainly have the opportunity to influence how things go down. Depending on your goal, this might look like: how strongly you make your case, how your presentation impacts perception, or how much you buff up on necessary skills.


6. Where in this scenario do you have no control? (4:04)

Some things are just out of your hands. Put that down on paper, too.


7. Do something. (4:46)

Now that you’ve looked at your fear from all these angles, it’s decision time.


You and you alone are responsible for creating your life. And you deserve one that’s filled with all the incredible, outrageous and exhilarating things and experiences you want. Yeah, fear is scary. I get that. But so what? Fear ain’t got nothin’ on you!

Stop feeling your way through this fear thing and put your brain in the driver’s seat. Take the time to examine what’s really got you stuck, get real with the best and worst possible outcomes, look at the possibilities from every angle, and then, finally, decide for yourself which is going to reign victorious — your fears or your badassery!

Who's Your Hilda?

She's crafty. She's sneaky. She’s your awful inner critic. (I call her Hilda.)

She’s the one with the disempowering messages who cunningly chips away at your confidence. While you’re eager to shake the world by its shoulders, Hilda’s in your head, spewing nonsense to trigger self-doubt, self-consciousness, second guessing, and defeat.

And if you buy into her nonsense for too long, you will end up squandering your potential.

You’re sick of her sabotaging ways, But, you can outsmart her once you understand her.

Let's do that. Right now. 

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